When All Hope Seems Lost…

John 16:33

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”

Isaiah 61:3

“To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.”

So here I sit with my glass of wine and my coconut cake – with my heart aching a little.

I’m no stranger, I’ve been here before, especially over this last year.  I’m not going to pretend that I haven’t cleared out many a wine bottle and kept the Pepperidge Farm people fully employed with benefits.

It’s not the end of the world, not by a longshot, but sometimes, life just seems a little hopeless and just a little too hard.

We all get that way sometimes, I think- surely I can’t be the only one that ever feels like my world is spinning a little out of control and I’m weary and tired of trying to hang on.

Tonight I feel like certain things will never work out for me:

• I’ll be single forever
• I’ll never be enough to please my wounded mother
• There will never be full restoration in my family
•  I’ll never have enough- I’ll never be truly valued to the degree that I should be
• I’ll never have the discipline to be as healthy as I want to be
• Nobody likes me, everybody hates me – bring on the worms!

And the list just goes on and on; in other words, a pity party.
These are all things that I feel in my heart.  There was a time in my life not that long ago where these feelings would’ve buried me.

Fortunately, I know how to climb out of this funk, but I also know there can be healing in the funk.  Sometimes, your heart just needs to grieve.  The safest place to do that?  God’s presence.  Not just His word, but His actual presence.  Become like Mary and just sit at His feet, put your head in His lap and pour your aching heart out.

You might argue that He already knows your heart; sure He does, but He wants that kind of relationship with you- the one where you trust Him enough to actually talk with Him.  He longs for that fellowship with you.

So do it- get alone with God and pour your heart out, get it all out and sob, ugly cry, and just sit at His feet.  Be angry, be sad, be hurt, be disappointed, be whatever emotion you’re feeling right then and tell Him what’s on your heart- the good, the bad, and the ugly.  He’s a great big God- He can handle your words.  What’s more, He wants to handle your heart- your accusations, your disappointments, He wants all of your burden.  He wants to comfort you in every way that you need comforting.

I know from my own experience, it’s in those heart-rendering times that He tends to speak the most profound things to me.

See, usually, while I’m pouring out, He’s pouring into me.  Man, I am so grateful for that.  When I’m emptying myself out, He’s filling me full of Him.  So often, this is the place where new revelation is born.  He speaks to me, and always, always reveals a new aspect of His love for me.

I started this evening out hurting, just kind of beat down- but I remembered the game-changer: Just because I feel something, doesn’t make it true (thank you Shawna for that wisdom).

Just because I don’t feel something, doesn’t make it true either.  Just because I can’t feel God working in my circumstances, doesn’t mean that He’s not- in fact, just about the opposite is always true- He’s working overtime, and change is coming.

Just because I feel disappointed or hopeless doesn’t make it true. 

Jeremiah 17:7-9

“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.
They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water.
Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought.
Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.

The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked.

Who really knows how bad it is?”

Don’t believe the lie that you must stay in the funk.  Don’t buy into the feelings (or facts, whatever the circumstances might be), wholeheartedly believe the truth.

For me- it looks like this:

Feeling (Facts)	Truth
I’ll be single forever	God has promised to provide a husband He created just for me; He also promised me a family of my own
I’ll never be enough to please my wounded mother	I am not supposed to be enough; He is the only One who can heal her heart
There will never be full restoration in my family	God is the God of restoration; His word never returns void and He promised to restore it years ago
I’ll never have enough- I’ll never be truly valued to the degree that I should be	He is my provider; He not only values me, He delights in me
I’ll never have the discipline to be as healthy as I want to be	His grace is more than sufficient for me; I can do all things with His strength
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me – bring on the worms!	I am not to be conformed to this world – His opinion of me is ALL that defines me- He calls me righteous and beloved

Life is just hard and God knows it’s hard.  That popular saying that God doesn’t give us more than we can bear is a lie- God wants to bear it for us.

If you’re struggling- He’ll meet you right where you’re at, right now, just get before Him and let it all out.  He longs for you…

Blessin’s Y’all!

~Pamela

Visit our website at: www.ACreativeWord.com

I can be reached at: Pamela@ACreativeWord.com

2015, Bring It!

“For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.

A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.”

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

2014 has been a whirlwind year for me.  It’s been a year of big faith and great opportunities for God to show off.  For those who know me, saying I don’t like change is putting it mildly.  Even good change is a struggle for me.  In my experience, change usually meant turning my life upside down and while it’s inevitable and even healthy for change to take place, it’s taxing for me.

This last year has been big, probably one of the biggest in my life- with huge lifestyle changes that will affect me for the rest of my life.

The thought of shaving my head was terrifying.  Fortunately, I've got amazing people that celebrated with me and made it fun.

Ouch- not the most fun I've ever had!

What Brain Surgery?
4 Weeks Post-Op

I had brain surgery!!!!  I was completely healed from the constant migraines and pain I’d experience almost all of my life.  While the beginning of the year was pure hell, it challenged me both physically and spiritually, I can say that it increased my faith, stretched me and forced me to grow in ways I could’ve never imagined.  I went places mentally and spiritually that I couldn’t even fathom and I watched first-hand God reach into my life and pull me from the darkness.  I experience healing in my body that doctors never thought was possible and I watched my family come together in a way that I honestly believed would never happen.

I also experienced great loss.  All of my adult life, I’ve wanted children of my own.  Many know of the infertility struggles that John and I faced when we were married and know the pain that entails.  I’ve had endometriosis since I was 14 years old and have suffered with many surgeries to maintain it long enough to attempt pregnancy.  In September during a routine surgery to get ‘cleaned out’ my doctor of 10 years realized we had reached the end and informed me that I would need a complete and total abdominal hysterectomy.  Years of surgeries (both related to the disease and not) had riddled my body with scar tissue and the disease itself had destroyed a lot of healthy tissue.

We did a lot of lounging around this year...

So, on Veteran’s Day I had my complete hysterectomy.  For someone at the ripe old age of 33, that was a struggle.  Knowing that I would never bear children broke my heart and hurt my soul.

Much to my surprise though, there was a sense of relief that came when it was all over with.  I have no control anymore, no more pressure to hurry up and get married so I can produce a human, none of that anymore.  I’ve always been open to adoption and now, that is my option.  It’s a really good one and I trust that when the time is right, God will just take care of it.  Like He always does.

I am so blessed that I have two beautiful step-daughters that I claim as my own and that God is restoring those relationships as well.

It was said at church at the beginning of 2014 that this would be a year of double rest.  It certainly has been for me, I’ve had two major operations that required lengthy recovery times and I’ve been forced into seasons of rest twice.  I’ve had it prophesied over me that this next year will be a year of ministry and fulfillment of great promise.  To say the least, I’m READY for some good stuff! 

Don’t get me wrong, it’s been full of really great stuff too.  I’ve learned who my friends are, and I always had people that helped me laugh when I so desperately needed.

I realized how much value there is in having people that will stop and intercede, not just pray, but really storm the gates of heaven on my behalf when I can’t pray for myself.

I’ve learned through the many meals brought to me over the year how many of my friends are master chefs and how many should bring good take-out.

I’ve seen so much grace and mercy and unending patience as my friends and coworkers deal with my issues of memory and word loss.  It’s humbling to lose your words and short term memories and instead of humiliating me, they encouraged me and praised my progress.

God has brought remarkable people into my life, I’ve watched God work through doctors and I’ve had surgeons pray over me.

I’ve had the chance to minister and watch God work through me and my scars to bring freedom to so many people that I wouldn’t have had the courage to minister to before.

Daisy and Chester loved having Mommy home so much!

It’s been a long, difficult year, but one of so much growth, some of it extremely painful, but definitely necessary.  I can honestly say that no matter where I’m struggling, no matter how much my heart is hurting and my head doesn’t understand, my Father is always eager to meet me right where I’m at.  I’ve been on my face before God pouring my heart out and I’ve stomped around my house shouting angrily at Him more than I have ever done in my life.  I’ve also experienced powerful moments of grace at times that I know I wouldn’t have survived without it.

He’s a great big God and He can handle my heart at its most raw and uncensored.  No matter what I throw at Him, He can take it and more importantly, He still delights in me.

The fact of the matter is that I know God’s heart for me and that revelation has carried me through the most difficult of time in my life.  I have been as raw and transparent before the Lord as I can be and I’ve felt His presence in my life in ways that blow my mind.  I’ve gone deeper into intimacy with Him than I ever thought possible.  I am more in love with the God of the universe than ever before.

Even still, change is difficult for me.

I do know this - with all of the challenges this past year, it has increased my capacity for God and it has stirred a fire inside of me that I never want to be satisfied- I never want to reach a place of complacency with God.

I want everything that God has for me and I won’t settle for less than His best for me.

Several years ago when I made the decision to walk with God again, I asked God to reveal Himself to me.  I had grown up listening to who others thought God was and who I thought He should be and that His thoughts towards me were only good if I behaved a certain way.  When I came back to the Lord, I wanted to know the truth.  I wanted to know God’s heart for me- whatever that might’ve looked like.  I desperately wanted a real relationship with God, not religion and that’s exactly what I got.

At that time, I chose not to read His word, I wanted it straight from the Holy Spirit, I wanted to hear God for Himself, and man, am I ever glad I did!  Over the years, the things that God has showed me and the way He has transformed my heart would blow your mind.

Let me encourage you, as you go into this New Year, declare blessing over yourself, over your family, and increase your capacity for God.  Ask Him to take you deeper into His presence than you ‘ve ever been.  Ask God for a new experience with Him.  Ask to know Him in a new way.

He wants to show you His heart for you and I know for sure, that it is good.

Don’t make resolutions for God this year, just love Him and let Him love you- to the fullest.

I can guarantee it will change your life, and maybe, just maybe, your heart too.

“For I am about to do something new.
    See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?”

Isaiah 43:19

Be blessed, y’all!

~Pamela

Visit our website at: www.ACreativeWord.com

I can be reached at: Pamela@ACreativeWord.com

It’s Just A Little Crush, So What?!

Daniel Dae Kim & Wife
 

Hugh Jackman & Wife
 



We live in a super-sexualized society where we worship and even idolize beautiful people.  Sex is everywhere and we’ve become desensitized to it because it’s everywhere. It’s only natural that we develop little crushes on celebrities, right?

 

So I had an intriguing thought the other day while watching an episode of Hawaii Five-0.I love this show- it’s entertaining, has plenty of suspense, and let’s face it; all of the actors are attractive and endearing in some way.

I have a particular crush on Daniel Dae Kim.  So what’s wrong with having a little crush on some good-looking actor?  I’m not stalking him, I’m not spending hours fantasizing about him, so what’s the harm? I’d make little comments about how hot he was, how I’d have his baby if he’d give me 5 minutes (I’ve also said this about Hugh Jackman) and little thoughts like that would just creep in and come out of my mouth before I even realized what I was doing.

Let’s be realistic here, there’s little chance that I’d ever meet him, and if I did somehow get the chance to see him in person, I can almost guarantee there would be no baby-making going on.

I did however realize that I was beginning to feel a tinge of conviction (not condemnation) whenever I would pin his pictures or I would make a comment to myself while watching the show.  His wife came to mind.  I had done some research on him and realized that he’s married, and has been for quite some time.  By me lusting after him (to whatever ‘harmless’ degree it was), I was dishonoring his wife, his marriage, and the covenant he made with his wife.

Ouch.

So it got me to thinking.  I had a Pinterest Board titled: “I’d have your baby…” and it was full of pictures of men (& woman) that were attractive/beautiful, and even people that I admired.  I posted these pictures with no regard whatsoever to what God might think about my actions.

What if the celebrity (or stranger off the street for that matter), is not married- should you even worry about it?

Well, this is what God says:

“But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman (or man) with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Matthew 5:28 NLT

It’s just a bad idea.  It may seem harmless and innocent because the odds of even having an opportunity to act on it are slim to none, but it does have real implications, even if they aren’t obvious.

I’ll give you an example:
I knew a woman who was infatuated with a famous musician and constantly posted pictures of him on Facebook, often in a provocative pose, and she’d even send them to her friends as a ‘pick me up’. Even when she was around her husband, she’d talk about how hot this guy was and what she’d do to him if she had the opportunity.  After a while, her husband began to hate this guy, hated just hearing the sound of his name, and would voice his opinions to his wife about his disdain for this guy.

He began to pull away from her intimately.

She couldn’t understand why and she came to me.

 

Now, I don’t proclaim to have any infinite wisdom here on marriage, but I do know a thing or two about how not to have a healthy marriage and have a little hard-earned wisdom on how to make different, better choices in the future.

She was frustrated with her husband for suddenly not wanting her anymore and even questioned his faithfulness to her.  I asked her to consider having the tables turned for a minute.

What if he was infatuated with a gorgeous celebrity? What if he talked about her the way she talked about this guy?  What if he spent hours looking at her pictures online and sharing them with his friends?  What if he did this right in front of her?  How would she feel?

Her answer was simple: “I’d feel like he wanted her more than he wanted me.  I’d feel like I couldn’t measure up to what he has built up as perfection in his mind. I’d feel like he was settling for me.”

Even Christians fall into this trap.  Pointing this out, is probably not going to make me popular, but I’ve never been one to set out to make new friends and influence people.

No condemnation here, but my goal is to challenge you to allow the Holy Spirit to reveal truth to you, and be open to hear what He might have to say.

Any time you allow your thoughts to rule you, you open the door for sin to enter.  It doesn’t have to be a famous person, it can be some guy in your office, or some woman you see at Starbuck’s every morning, it just has to be someone who is not your spouse.

Let me encourage you if you’re like me and felt that little ping of conviction: there’s grace for that.  God’s not punishing you for having those feelings and desires for someone, but He does want you to take authority over your thoughts and not give the enemy any legal access to the door of sexual sins.

He wants you to live a life of freedom and that always starts with what you allow into your mind, which makes its way into your heart. Want to know what’s in your heart? Listen more carefully to what you’re speaking.

Matthew 12:34 says that from the abundance of

the heart, the mouth speaks.

I was convicted, that doesn’t mean that you will or should be, but it is actually an answer to prayer for something I had asked God at the beginning of the year: to expand my territory, take me even deeper into intimacy with Him, and allow me to be more sensitive to what the Holy Spirit is saying.

That’s happening.  I asked that because I wanted to grow.  I don’t ever want to be content in my walk with God, I want to be stretched and used to the full capacity that He will use me.

This just happens to be an area that He is stretching and challenging me in right now.

Now, I’m asking you to be challenged; trust God enough to ask to be stretched, to help you grow, and to be make you more sensitive to the Holy Spirit.

Blessin’s Y’all!

Pamela Hill

Please visit our website: www.ACreativeWord.com

I can be reached by email at: Pamela@ACreativeWord.com

 

 

Daniel's pic was found here.

Hugh's pic was found here.



 

 

 

 

 

It's Christmas Y'all...

Christmas time has to be one of my most favorite holidays ever, just after Thanksgiving.

Homes get all decked out in their finest decorations, people get sentimental over special ornaments, and ordinary places get a little bit cozier than usual.

I love decorating my tree- it stands as a ‘trophy’ of my Christmas-y abilities and I proudly display it for all to see.  My second pride and joy is my village that my mom adds to every year. 

I love to see the unique kindness and gentleness that we tend to show each other during this time of year.  Society deems this as the season of giving.

There’s some truth to that.  This is the season of giving- it’s when the ultimate gift was given to the world.  Jesus.

Let’s talk about Christmas Carols for a minute- most of us know them all, and probably a few of us know all the verses to our favorites.  Have we ever taken the time to really listen to the lyrics?  I mean, like, really think about what they’re really saying?

“Hark the Harold Angels Sing” is one that comes to mind immediately- it literally talks about how the angels in Heaven rejoiced at the birth of the King.

“Silent Night” speaks of the humbleness that the King of the world was born into.

“Little Drummer Boy” talks about a young boy who has come to see the King of Kings the only thing of real value that he possesses, his raw talent.  This young man recognizes that this is no ordinary baby, the humble position that he finds himself in, and desperately wants to show his adoration in the best way that he knows how.

I’ll be honest, until the other day when I saw the video posted below, I never gave much thought to that song and it wasn’t one of my favorites.  I see it differently now and it speaks powerfully to me.

Christmas is a difficult season for me now that I’m divorced and find myself without a family of my own.  I usually get pretty depressed and tend to dwell on the thoughts of how things ‘used to be’ when I was married.  We, (my ex-husband and his girls) would spend hours decorating our beautiful tree and watching Shrek  and listening to the Shrek Christmas CD and laughing and all getting along.  It was so precious to me.  Up until I left, we did it every year and I treasured that time together.

Now, I put my tree up myself and it’s just not the same.  There’s a certain amount of emptiness that comes with doing that.  Even if I have help, it’s an emptiness that only a family of my own can fulfill.

So, that being said, this year I asked the Father to help me by giving me a different outlook, help me to see this holiday in a different way.  I’m so grateful I did.

I heard “The Little Drummer Boy” in a new way and it spawned the whole Christmas Carol thought process.  It took me back to that miraculous night, where my Savior was brought into this world to a young woman who found favor with the God of the Universe.

You see, there were people that God sent angelic messengers to that believed this was the Messiah, knew that this was the Savior and Redeemer that was sent to save the World.

Wise men, royalty, shepherds, came to bring a baby- the King of Kings, their most treasured belongings as gifts, and bow before Him.  See, they knew He wasn’t just a baby, I firmly believe they recognized exactly who He was.

Can you imagine going before the One who was promised to save the world?  To save you?  To be close enough to Him that you could see the fleshy tones in His skin, to see Him smile for the first time?  Can you imagine what it was like to literally kneel before the One who would change the course of history forever?  Can you imagine?

I challenge you as you decorate your homes, cook that magnificent Christmas feast, snuggle in on snowy/icy days with your loved ones (even if those loved ones are furry), and send out Christmas cards to those you love; to ask the Father to help you really see this holiday for what He intended it to be.  Ask Him to reveal just a little more of His heart to you.  My prayer for you is that you’ll be as pleasantly surprised as I was when I asked.

I pray that you’re blessed beyond measure this holiday season and that you are blessed with new revelation of just how much the God of the Universe loves you; after all, He did send His most treasured gift to you, because He delighted in you, even before the foundations of the earth were laid.

From my heart to yours, Merry Christmas!!
 

Blessin’s Y’all!

Pamela

 

Where's Your Focus?

Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable—if there is any moral excellence and if there is any praise—dwell on these things.

 Philippians 4:8 (HCSB)

What takes your focus away from the Father?
I'll be honest, I really believed that my whole focus was on God- I mean, I adore Him and love Him with my whole being and I truly only want to go where He takes me.  I only want to hear His voice and I only want to do His will for me.
However...
There are still things that pull my focus away from Him and back onto myself.  They're subtle and we all do it at some point or another.
Here's some things that I personally allow to deter my focus:

• The way I look at my own body.  Ugh, this is a tough one and I believe that many women struggle with this.  There are days that I flat out hate my body and the way I look.  I end up pouring all my attention into self-loathing rather than focusing on His purpose for my body.
• My own thoughts- like anyone else, my thoughts race, constantly.  I always dream because my brain never just shuts down.  I have more thoughts in a day than I feel like I can control.  The truth is, I can control them, and I don't have to let them walk all over me.  I need to practice 'capturing' my thoughts more often. 
• Money. This is another tough one- when an unexpected bill shows up, or even when I have a little extra money coming my way, I still tend to obsess and worry about it. 

What are some things that pull your focus? 

• Maybe you have a sick child (I have several friends that are dealing with this right now) that you're more focused on than the Father.
• Maybe you and your spouse aren't getting along lately
• Maybe you're in a rut
• Maybe you're lonely
• Maybe you're stressed out at work
• Maybe your kids are demanding your attention
• Maybe you're working so hard to control every little detail of your life and everyone in it just to keep it from 'spinning out of control'
• Maybe you're wondering how much more you can handle

My point is that we shouldn't allow anything to pull our focus from God.  After all, He's everything and everywhere, in every situation, in every circumstance and He holds you and your circumstances in the palm of His hand.
He knows all the balls you have in the air, kids, work, finances, and He's already got it worked out, He's just waiting for you to just trust Him.

In my distress I prayed to the Lord,
and the Lord answered me and set me free.

Psalm 118:5

A pretty common lie from the enemy is that God won't put more on us than we can handle.  Folks, that's a HUGE lie- no where in the Word does God tell us to carry all the burden we can and then cast the 'rest' of our cares on Him.  No, it says to cast ALL your cares on Him and HE will give us rest.  (1 Peter 5:7)
God doesn't want to test you and see how much you can deal with; He doesn't continue to give you more junk to handle- that's not His goal. 
In fact, He wants you to stop trying to handle it all and trust Him to take care of it.  He wants to release you from the responsibility of trying to take care of everything and the hurtful feeling of failure when you just can't. 
See, when we put our trust in Him and focus our thoughts towards Him, He takes care of everything, even when we don't see anything happening. 
We're completely off the hook.
So, the next time you're bombarded with things that are demanding your attention and pulling your focus away from God, stop, and take that moment to just say, "I trust you, Father." 
It helps keep your focus where it should be.  You're re-directing your thoughts from what you can't control to someone who can. 
The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10) - if he can steal your joy and your kill your ability to trust God, he will destroy you.  Jesus came so that we'd have life more abundantly.
Put your attention and trust where it belongs- on the only One who can handle and change your life.
Sit back, trust Him and just watch and see what He does.  He only wants good things for you- no matter what your circumstances may look like.

For the Lord delights in his people;
he crowns the humble with victory.

Psalm 149:4

Be blessed!!!
~Pamela

www.ACreativeWord.com
Pamela@acreativeword.com



 

 



Forgiveness - Ugh, Do I Have To?!

Ephesians 4:32 (NLT)

Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

*Insert whiny voice here*

Forgiveness is not my favorite topic of discussion.  It is unpopular, it’s not fun, and it is usually painful. 

It’s also one that reminds me of where I am sure to fall short.  That being said, it's on my heart today.

Over my lifetime, I’ve had many unpleasant things happen to me, many people have hurt me, wounded me, and done things to me that most would agree are unreasonable to forgive.

There was a time in my walk with the Lord that I tried to rationalize with Him about forgiveness (haha, yeah, I’m going to ‘reason’ with the Creator of the Universe, right).  I’d say things like: “Well, Father, I’ve already forgiven these people that hurt me this way, so because I forgave them for such a big thing, I should be given a free pass on this one who just hurt me a little bit.”

Uh, God doesn’t work that way. 

Harboring unforgiveness is like holding onto a hot curling iron and not letting go.

Eventually, it will destroy that thing that holds it.

You can tell yourself all you want that it’s not as hot as it seems and it’s not as painful as it looks, but the truth is it’s destroying the tissues in your hand.  Once you’ve initially grabbed hold of that curling iron, whether intentionally or not, it’s surprisingly hot and it’s likely to leave a blister that may go away on its own. 

However, the longer you hold onto the hot iron, the deeper the burn will go and the more likely it is to leave a permanent scar.

Every time you look down, you’ll see that scar and be reminded of that particular wound.

It’s the same way when people wound us.  Usually, at first, we’re surprised that they hurt us and it may only take us a short time to realize that we must let go of that hurt and forgive them.  It will probably leave a small (if at all) trace of what happened.

On the other hand, if we choose to hold onto that hurt, the deeper the damage to our hearts, and sometimes our souls.  This leaves a permanent abrasion so that every time we face that abrasion, we remember those who wounded us and the hurt spreads like a infection, ultimately destroying us.

Unforgiveness does nothing but create additional pain, resentment, bitterness, and is the stealer of our joy, thus sapping our strength and health (Nehemiah 8:10).

Maybe you’re the person that needs forgiveness.  We’ve all been there, and as long we’re living and breathing on this earth, we’ll always be in a position where we’ll need forgiveness from others.

There have been things in my life that I’ve had to forgive myself of: adultery, not being good example of what a Godly woman is to my daughters, being deceitful, being prideful and entitled, and being malicious and spiteful when it suited me.

Sometimes the person that is the hardest to forgive is yourself. 

I heard someone remark today that they were going to seek peace about an individual that wronged them by going to church every Sunday. 

While going to church is a good, healthy way to enhance your Christian walk, it will not bring you lasting peace.

We live in a world that is craving true and saturating peace; a peace that this world cannot give them.  They are yearning for something that will heal those permanent wounds in their lives and are crying out.

Instead of just pointing people to ‘church’, we should be pointing them to Jesus.

I advised this acquaintance of mine that church is good, but if she wants real peace (& the ability to forgive this person), she’s only going to find that in an intimate relationship with the Father and quality time spent in His presence.

Asking for and giving out forgiveness is not something to be taken lightly.  God certainly doesn’t and He expects us to make it the top priority in our lives. 

Mark 11:25 (NLT)

 “But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”

Matthew 6:15 (NLT)

“But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

As a Christian, we not simply asked to forgive, we’re commanded to do it, Peter asked Jesus how many times he had to forgive his neighbor, and Jesus’ reply was seventy-times-seven. (Matthew 18: 21-22)

Okay, that’s math I won’t do and I’m too lazy to keep track, so I’m just going to go with, I’m supposed to forgive them every time they wrong me.

Does that mean that I have to continue to have them in my life if they’re causing severe damage?  Does that mean that I have to continue having a relationship with them? 

If the Lord has released you to kick them to the curb, do it, but with Godly love.

I know that forgiveness is hard, and I know that there are most certainly things and people in our lives that we, in our own strength, simply cannot forgive.

That’s where our Father comes in.  It is with His strength and His ability that we’re able to do that.  It is only with His love that comes permanent healing and forgiveness is what paves the way to that permanent healing we're so desperate for.

We cannot be healed if we do not forgive.

Proverbs 17:9 (NLT)

Love prospers when a fault is forgiven,
but dwelling on it separates close friends.

Forgiveness and restoration go hand in hand, you cannot have one without the other. 

Unforgiveness creates a separation between you and someone else and prohibits true relationship.  No matter how miniscule the offense may be, for a time, there is separation and your love may become conditional.  Exercising true forgiveness creates restoration between you and the offending party and opens the door for unconditional love.

When you break a bone, it is said that when it heals, the bone is stronger that it was before it was broken.

I know that my God is more than capable of doing just that in relationships between His people.  I’ve seen it work in my own life.

Most importantly, forgiveness is not a feeling- it's not something we do when we 'feel that we are ready'; it's a commandment from God.  It's an act of sacrificial obedience.  We have to give up something - more often than not, control and stubbornness, in order to fulfill our obligation to God.

Is there someone in your life that you deem as unforgivable because of the hurt that they’ve caused you?  Maybe you feel that they are unworthy of your forgiveness? 
Despite the circumstances, when we sincerely forgive others who have wounded us, we are reinstated to freedom from that particular wound. We are no longer in agreement with what that hurt tells us to feel or how to act, we are able to choose our actions and not be ruled by that hurt any longer.  No matter what transpired or how deep that hurt goes, God promises to use it for our good.  He says that He uses everything, all things; not ‘some’ things, but all things for our good.

Romans 8:28 (NLT)

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

God’s a pretty smart guy like that, He knows what’s best for us and that harboring hurt and unforgiveness does nothing but poison us.  He says that He’s come so that we may have life and more abundantly- He wants us to be free and healthy, therefore, we must forgive those who hurt us.

I know that I fall short in this area but I am confident that I am a work in progress.

Philippians 1:6 (NLT)

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

 Let me encourage you today that if there is someone who you need to forgive, but you just can’t seem to do it in your strength, take refuge in the knowledge that you were never meant to do that on your own.  You have the power through your spoken word to exercise forgiveness through your Father.
Ask Him for help- ask Him to give you what you need in order to forgive.

He’s just waiting for you to cry out and ask for help. 

He’s anxiously waiting to hear from you. 

You are important to Him.

This is Matthew Wests' song and testimony about "Forgiveness" and can be found here.  It really blessed me.