“Take delight in the
Lord, and
He will give you
your heart’s desires.”
He will give you
your heart’s desires.”
Psalm 37:4
“…Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. You
people will be my people, and your God will be my God.”
~Ruth 1:16
~Ruth 1:16
Hello Blogging Universe!
Been too long since I posted
here, but I feel like it’s time now.
I’m posting because I have
to share something about this picture:
It’s amazing how God works things out that seem impossible. If you’ve ever read my blog posts in the past, you know I was single a painfully long time. I prayed a LOT of prayers, begged, pleaded and cried an ocean of tears to not do life alone anymore. More than once I begged the Holy Spirit to make me understand why I was single for so long.
Turns out, I was living in the wrong state. Hahaha
Well, maybe there was more
to it than that, but I digress.
During all those oh-so-glamourous-heart-wrenching-moments-with-God,
He revealed something to me.
I will never forget the
moment He showed me a picture of my future- at the time, I was in misery. I was lonely, hadn’t been asked out on a date
in months, seemingly invisible to the opposite sex. My heart was aching for someone to love and love
me back.
Like I had done some many times before, I poured my heart out to the Lord, begging, pleading, snotting, crying, and when I got all my words out, I asked for a promise, a glimpse, something to hold onto to keep me from losing my mind altogether.
Like I had done some many times before, I poured my heart out to the Lord, begging, pleading, snotting, crying, and when I got all my words out, I asked for a promise, a glimpse, something to hold onto to keep me from losing my mind altogether.
God revealed a picture to me
– a literal picture. It was huge and
sitting on a mantel over a fireplace. It was a picture of my wedding day at the
altar with my husband and the minister.
Of course, all I could make out was 2 blobs where the guys were however,
I could see myself clearly. I was
laughing like an idiot. I had that huge
mouth gaping, belly laugh expression on my face – clearly I was cracking up at
something. I remember hearing the Lord
say, ‘I am preparing you for a marriage full of joy and laughter. Trust me.’
Talk about humbling. My first marriage had been such a nightmare
and there was rarely laughing and absolutely no joy between us. It was almost a concept I couldn’t
fathom. I mean, I knew that it would be
better, but I didn’t know how much.
“You found parts of me I didn’t know existed and in you I found
a love I no longer believed was real.”
~Unknown
As the years went by, I kept
that picture tucked away in my heart and clung to it in the many periods of loneliness.
Fast forward to March of
2016 – I meet this police officer while I’m temping for the City of River
Falls. We start chatting and I flirt and
he’s clueless (which should tell you about my flirting skills). He has a quirky sense of humor and a
sensitivity that draws me to him. That
August, we start really talking –
more than just small talk in the break room.
By mid-September, we were in
a relationship.
Since that time, we’ve been
through the ringer. We’ve been through
hell and back and have come out stronger and even more united.
When I say we belly laugh
every day- I mean it. We really do- we
crack each other up on the regular.
“I love that you are my person and I am yours, that whatever
door we come to, we will open it together.”
~A. R. Rasher~
Over the last 2 years, I’ve
had that picture pop up from time to time but for the most part, it stayed
tucked away. I never even told Bryant
about it- I hadn’t given up on it, but I know that sometimes things don’t look
exactly like we think they will.
I figured the picture the
Lord showed me was indicative of a relationship of lots of laugher and all that
junk- which I had.
I really thought that, and I
was good with it. That is, until I saw
our engagement photos at 3am this morning and it slapped me right in the face.
I couldn’t believe what I
was looking at. No, it wasn’t a wedding
picture, and I wasn’t with a minister, and I wasn’t in my amazing wedding dress,
but it was the exact same expression I saw before. Purely candid and full of joy, love, and so,
so much happy.
We’re not perfect, but we
are perfect for each other. There is no
question in my mind that Bryant is the fulfillment of God’s promise to me.
Bryant is proof that God is true to His word.
Bryant is proof that God is true to His word.
I never knew I could love
this much or be this happy. Bryant constantly
challenges me to be a better person – constantly points me to the Father – and is
the calm to my crazy.
Our relationship is further
evidence that God always, ALWAYS brings beauty from ashes – especially when
ashes are all we have to offer Him.
I’m so grateful for Bryant
and I can’t wait to be his wife!!
Blessin’s, y’all!
Pamela (soon to be) Ekstrom